Trust in the LORD with all your heart; and lean not unto your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths. — Proverbs 3:5-6
Walking alone in the desert, thirsty and bone tired, you look on the horizon and see a refreshing pool of beautiful, crystal clear water. A wave of relief washes over you and you find the will to keep going, to get to this thing you desire. You keep walking and walking but never seem to get any closer to this oasis. And that's when you realize. This pool, this promise of relief, isn't real. It's simply a mirage and you are no closer to finding the help you need.
This is what living with addiction is like and that is my personal wilderness. For years, I've been looking to relieve the guilt of my vices. Every time I thought I'd found it, I'd quickly realize that it was only a mirage and I was still wandering in my own desert. In my mind, I thought I could beat addiction on my own. I didn't want to admit I had a problem until I had already beaten it. So I kept chasing that mirage. It wasn't until I actually admitted to those I love that I had a problem that I found the oasis I was seeking.
When wandering in the wilderness, instead of chasing mirages, seek the Living Water which quenches every thirst. God's love is eternal and always sustaining, even in the most desolate place.
